Survivor Series 2013 - Is this episode of Raw over yet?

People Power returns! To shill merch with the lower-mid card!

Yeah, yeah, yeah I know that I said when I started this blog that I didn't want it to turn into me complaining about wrestling but I just wanted to do a quick recap of Survivor Series results and my thoughts. The preface is necessary because Survivor Series was just kinda there. A few memorable moments but honestly, nothing more interesting than could happen on any episode of Raw.

I got to watch the pay-per-view over a friend’s house so at least I didn’t have to pony up the $50 or whatever it is now to buy a WWE PPV. The running joke over the course of the night was that Survivor Series (or Surbibor Series if you’re Alberto Del Rio) was “the worst episode of Raw ever” and while that’s a bit of an embellishment, it was also pretty apt. Besides Mark Henry’s return and John Laurenitis showing up during a WWE Power Slammers commercial (nothing like in-house ads during programming you pay extra for), nothing really stood out as memorable about the show.

Except Zeb twerking. That was pretty memorable.

The show started with Miz and Kofi in the pre-show match. This feud is already kinda ridiculous in how it’s being presented. First, Miz bails on Kofi during a tag team match. Then, Miz says on commentary that he did it, not because he’s a jerk, but because he wants to help Kofi! He did it so that he and Kofi would have a match at Survivor Series and it would be awesome or something! Okay? The match itself sure was a match but it got even more confusing as Miz offered a handshake to Kofi after the match…and Kofi slapped him! What?? So try to follow – Miz pulls a heel move by bailing on Kofi. Miz says he did it with good intentions so they would have a match. Miz wins the match and tries to shake Kofi’s hand (a face move) but Kofi slaps him instead. I guess Kofi is a heel now? Who knows – I sure don’t.

Triple H and Stephanie came out before the first match to tell everyone that there wouldn’t be any physical interference in any match at Survivor Series. Which, come on, you all know what that means.

The show proper opened with the 5-on-5 elimination match between The Shield and Real Americans versus the Usos, Rhodes Brothers and Rey Mysterio. Solid match overall. Dean Ambrose was eliminated first, followed by the Real Americans, leaving only Seth Rollins and Roman Reigns. Reigns went full-on beast mode, spearing an Uso, Cody, Goldust and Rey to pick up the win. Ambrose will surely have something to say about being the first eliminated or that he is still superior to Reigns since he has a title. It definitely seems like they are gearing up for a Reigns face turn, though. Lawler even said something to the effect of, “You did it, big guy!” about Reigns as the segment was ending, basically cementing the idea that he’ll turn soon.

Every spear Reigns hit at Survivor Series

Big E continued being awesome by beating Curtis Axel in his Intercontinental title rematch. Nothing much else to write about. I’ll be surprised if Axel doesn’t disappear into obscurity now. The only other thing this brought to mind was I hope Big E’s newfound popularity can maybe help get Dolph Ziggler back on TV. They were in a tag match together the other week so there’s hope.

The Divas elimination match wasn’t as bad as I thought it would be but it was still pretty bland. It was weird how sometimes a Diva would tag in, have one move done to her, and get pinned. But considering how much time they usually give one-on-one Divas matches, they probably wanted to get a 7-on-7 done as quickly as possible. Nikki Bella and Summer Rae had a brief dance battle and The Worm made an appearance on WWE TV again.  Natalya eventually got the win when she made AJ tap with the Sharpshooter.

Nice moves, but you're still no Summer Rae, Nikki

Ryback also continued being awesome, interrupting the panel consisting of Mick Foley, Bret Hart and Booker T that was being hosted by Josh Matthews. The Big Guy basically continued his new bully gimmick, talking down to the crowd and the legends he interrupted when he came out. He issued an open challenge that was answered by a returning Mark Henry, who is still in Rick Ross mode. Decent but short match with Henry picking up the win after a World’s Strongest Slam.

John Cena successfully defended his World Heavyweight title against Alberto Del Rio in a very solid match. Cena and ADR are two guys who don’t get a whole lot of credit from the “hardcore/IWC” fans but they put on a really good match last night. Nothing really stood out but it was solid nonetheless.

CM Punk and Daniel Bryan were victorious against the Wyatt Family in a great match that I only wish could have been every match on the card. I really hope that Punk and Bryan’s program with the Wyatts doesn’t end here because there’s still plenty of life in the story – especially once Daniel Bryan or Punk set their sights on the WWE Title again.

The WWE Title match also sure was a match. Nothing too memorable happened during the match itself until the conclusion. At one point, Triple H’s music hit and he and Steph come out of the entrance, distracting Big Show long enough for Orton to bring back the Punt and pick up the win. Unfortunately, the actual Punt itself looked about as good as Michael’s Sweet Chin Music at Hell in a Cell (read: they didn’t look good at all).

But just as it seemed for sure that this was indeed “the worst episode of Raw ever,” something happened that surprised even me because it was actually interesting – John Cena shows up! His music hits and Trips and Steph both look confused, as does Orton. Cena looks focused on Orton and brushes past The Authority as he makes his way into the ring. An epic confrontation must be in store, right?! Actually, they just kinda stared at each other for a while and the show went off the air.

Post Survivor Series thoughts

-How much longer will The Shield be together? Reigns and Rollins have seemingly been unhappy with Ambrose recently and depending on how the US champ reacts to the events of Survivor Series, the trio’s days may be numbered.

-What happens to ADR and Curtis Axel now? The defining character trait for both guys in recent months has been “being the World/IC champ” and now that they both have lost their belts and respective rematches, it might be tough for WWE to find new roles for them.

-Where does Punk and Bryan’s feud with the Wyatts go now? I’m sure that Bray won’t take the loss to “The Beard and The Best” very well but I’m very interested to see what happens next.

-The Rhodes don’t need the tag belts anymore. The tag team division is starting to grow, with believable heel and face contenders, and keeping the belts on Cody and Goldy doesn’t really help expand the division so much as it helped during their clashes with The Authority. But now that the Rhodes’ hostilities with the McMahons seems to have died down, keeping the belts on the Rhodes boys doesn’t help them as much as it hurts the tag division.

-I don’t mind that Total Divas is getting the Diva division at large more screen time, but I wish the WWE would put a bit more care into developing the Divas as characters rather than just lumping them into the “On Total Divas” and “Not On Total Divas” categories instead of, you know, faces and heels like you’re supposed to do in pro wrestling. Now the Bellas are faces and Kaitlyn is a heel and I don’t want to live on this planet anymore. (If you couldn’t tell, I’m completely disillusioned with Kaitlyn’s sudden alignment.)

-Big E needs a believable contender for his IC belt to keep his current momentum going. Ryback, perhaps? It would make E look even stronger if he, as the IC champion, stood up to Ryback’s bullying and heck, it could even win The Big Guy his first championship in WWE. I doubt that’s the direction they will take Big E in but it has potential.

-I honestly thought Xavier Woods would answer Ryback’s challenge. Mark Henry returning was a pleasant surprise though. Ryback totally should bully Xavier Woods though. He’s the new guy, kinda nerdy and he has a lot more fancy book learnin’ than Ryback – all perfect targets for Ryback’s newfound love of bullying.

-WHY did the show go off the air just as it seemed something interesting might happen near or with Randy Orton? Cena coming out to confront him following the WWE Title match creates a lot of questions. Was it because no one can stop The Authority except WWE’s resident Superman? Was it because he has a problem with Randy Orton? Could a WWE/World title unification match be in our future?  Hopefully we’ll get answers tonight on Raw and this storyline doesn’t fizzle into nothingness like when Shawn Michaels superkicked Daniel Bryan at Hell in a Cell. 

(All images/gifs from r/SquaredCircle)